cause and effect...

i realised that what T said about me is right...
i was into a state of depression during that period of time...
i think it's coming back now...

What is Depression?

Physical

Changes in sleeping pattern: much more or much less? Yes
Changes in eating patterns: much more or much less? No
Fatigue, loss of energy. Yes
Headaches, stomachaches or otherwise inexplicable aches and pains. Yes

Behavioral/Attitude

Diminished interest in and enjoyment of previously pleasurable activities-sex, sports, hobbies, going out with friends, etc. Yes
Difficulty concentrating or making decisions. Yes
Neglecting responsibilities and personal appearance. No

Emotional

Depressed mood-can mean feeling down, apathetic, irritable, pessimistic,hopeless, negative, guilty, anxious, empty, etc. Yes
Suicidal thoughts. No
Feeling hopeless and helpless. Yes
Feelings of worthlessness. Yes

fears, disappointments, angers, expectations...
all of these contribute to my state of mind now...

i know it's not healthy and i am doing my best to overcome it...
i hope i can get through it without losing anything...

i just want to be happy...
i want to grow up...